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What are the best ways to live in the old age when nobody wants to take care of you?

 Survey after survey shows, the greatest fear for someone in old age is being alone and having your life slowly fall apart. It is a terrifying prospect that until you get there, you want to avoid even thinking about it.

Every family has an excuse, there is no end to the reasons why you can’t take care of Mom, or god forbid Dad as Dads are always way more difficult and all but useless once they are no longer earning money and have few home skills other than having a drink at ‘5 o’clock somewhere’, but the reality is it is a global problem now, not even the Chinese or Japanese or other Asians are taking care of their parents any more. Everyone is ‘outsourcing’ the care of their loved ones and it is a frightening prospect to say the least to find yourself increasingly unable to take care of yourself in a very expensive landscape with diminishing funds. And let’s face it, everyone has diminishing resources especially the longer you live.

Unfortunately, we all must face the prospect of being alone or unwanted or your family just cannot take care of you.

Old angry and drinking alone, look like anyone you know including maybe yourself?

Having gone through this many times with relatives including my Mother and others, at some point it happens. Unless you have so much money you can paper it over or so many relatives, (eg children) who all agree somehow to pitch in to take care of you.

The ‘best’ way of course is planning as others have noted. I have several friends who have sold their properties and now live in retirement homes. I personally have not planned in this manner. Am I taking a risk that my partner will not be there for me? Yes, I suppose so.

Like others I exercise every day, I have children but don’t expect anything from them. In the end the best thing you can do is find a space that is simple, yours, no debt, have some steady retirement income that is enough to live on. Savings if you can manage it.

My experience is the layout has to be something you can do over and over no matter what shape you are in . If you lose your sight gradually, if you lose your mind, if you lose your ability to walk well. Go through the stages in advance, plan and then when you need to, make that move. Most importantly, it must be one level, not a single stairs if you can avoid it.

Be in control, get your mob phone pre programmed by numbers so you can call anyone and everyone that you need. Whether it is 911 or your kids, your diminishing number of friends, your doctor, your relatives.

Stay active in your mind at the minimum, walk, walk and walk again. Never stop walking and moving.

Go until you cannot, no planning can overcome giving up. Never give up. You don’t have to. You can do this for you.

After all, in the end it may be all you have left is you.


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