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Pain and Pleasure - Conclusion


Let's make some changes right now :

 First write down four actions that you need to take that you've been putting off.
Maybe you need to lose some weight. Maybe you need to stop smoking. Maybe you need to communicate with someone you've had a falling out with, or reconnect with someone who's important to you.

 Second, under each of these actions, write down the answer to the following questions: Why haven't I taken action? In the past, what pain have I linked to taking this action? Answering these questions will help you understand that what has held you back is that you've associated greater pain to taking the action than to not taking it. Be honest with yourself. If you're thinking, "I have no pain associated to it," think a little harder. Maybe the pain is simple: maybe it's the pain of taking time out of your busy schedule.

 Third, write down all the pleasure you've had in the past by indulging in this negative pattern. For example, if you think you should lose some weight, why have you continued to eat whole pans of brownies and bulk-size bags of chips, and to guzzle twelve-packs of soda pop? You're avoiding the pain of depriving yourself, yes, and at the same time you're really doing this because it makes you feel good right now. It gives you pleasure! Instant pleasure! No one wants to give up these feelings! In order to create a change that will last, we need to find a new way to get the same pleasure without any negative consequences. Identifying the pleasure you've been getting will help you know what your target is.

 Fourth, write down what it will cost you if you don't change now. What will happen if you don't stop eating so much sugar and fat? If you don't stop smoking? If you don't make that phone call that you know you need to make? If you don't start consistently working out each day? Be honest with yourself. What's  it going  to cost you emotionally? What's it going to cost you over the next two three, four, five years? What's it going to cost you emotionally? What's it going to cost you in terms of your self-image? What will it cost you in your  physical energy level? What will it cost you in your feelings of self-esteem? What  will it cost you financially? What will it cost you in your relationships with the people you care about most? How does that make you feel? Don't just say, It will cost me money" or "I will be fat." That's not enough. You've got to remember that what  drives us is our emotions.

 The final step is to write down all the pleasure you'll receive by taking each of these actions right now. Make a huge list that will drive you emotionally, that will really get you excited: "I'll gain the feeling of really being in control of my life, of knowing that I;m in charge. I'll gain a new level of self-confidence. I'll gain physical vitality and health. I'll be able to strengthen  all my relationships. I'll develop more willpower which I could use in every other area of my life. My life will be better in all these ways now. Over the next two, three, four, five years. By taking this action, I will live my dream........

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